or in my case, hot chocolate with whipped cream or maybe a chai tea?
Hello, friends! I hope you're having a good week.
If we were meeting together today, you would probably notice that something is up with me. A few weeks ago I wrote a post about my anxiety and depression. I thought I was doing well at the time but honestly I probably could already feel a relapse coming or I was at least trying to prevent a relapse by reminding myself of my "techniques".
Well, when depression and anxiety are a chemical imbalance, like mine is, those techniques help but sometimes the meds need adjusted.
I knew Sunday night, that I was feeling sad and still not well physically. I got an appt with my Dr.'s PA first thing Monday morning and lo and behold I had bronchitis on top of the anxiety and depression. I made an appt to talk to my Dr. about my meds and the earliest I could get in was yesterday morning.
Tuesday was pretty much a blur of crying and sobbing.
Wednesday was pretty much a blur of extreme anxiety and wanting to cry.
My appt was first thing Thursday morning, so we got the kids to school and went straight there. My anxiety is always worse in the morning and I knew I was going to be "talking" about "it" with my dr so I was a big messy ball of anxiety with every muscle in my body clenched.
I cried, he comforted, he explained everything again and told me we'd get it figured out. We added Abilify back to my combo again. It worked really well last time I tried it. It is crazy expensive so that is why I ended up off the Abilify/Lexapro combo and on Paxil instead. I just "happened" to get a coupon in the mail a few days ago for only a $25 co-pay on Abilify. God is good!
So, friends, I am begging for your prayers! I know I am in a constant state of prayer and pleading. Please pray that the Abilify works well.
I also ask that you pray that I have the confidence and strength to finally make an appt. to start seeing a therapist. I've said about it for years but once the meds are working, I like to forget about my issues. Until they come back and I can't ignore them.
As my dear husband, who has been with me through every step of this, told me Wednesday: It is time I stop letting my depression and anxiety control me and time for me to take control of it. If that means keeping regular appts with my dr and seeing a counselor, I must be brave and do it.
I can conquer!
Through all these things I can conquer through Him who loves me. Romans 8:37
So, friends, I need some prayer. And encouragement that I'm not alone in this struggle. Do any of you struggle with anxiety/depression? See a counselor? If you don't feel comfortable leaving a comment, please email me at: collettaskitchensink [at] yahoo [dot] com
Maybe now that I've written this, I will be able to go make myself a cup of tea and hopefully read your replies.
Prayers going out to you my dear.
ReplyDeletePrayers to you, my friend. Take care of yourself.
ReplyDeletePraying for you! I'm just stopping by from the Coffee Date link up. <3
ReplyDeleteAlesha <3
My dearest Colletta - you are not alone in this ... Yes, I have been (and am - especially during the dark gloomy days of winter) where you are at. For me Cymbalta seemed to do a good job - of getting control of the imbalances which can result in anxiety and depression. Try to get a good nights sleep ... rest is key (if you can get a nap in during the day, do it - even if you lay there quietly- without actually drifting off). Have you tried meditation? and talking with a therapist is a good idea.
ReplyDeleteI was just on a panel with Huff Post Live on Winter Blues. It's about 20 minutes you may find it helpful. http://live.huffingtonpost.com/r/segment/winter-blues/50f9ba5678c90a0f5f000309
Things are going to turn around for you my friend. Sending you hugs and prayers ... Blessings, Celia
Praying for you! Please do make that decision to see a therapist!
ReplyDeleteI know how difficult depression can me... praying this is the right answer for you girl!
ReplyDeleteDepression and Anxiety are horrid little beasts - then add a physical illness on top of that and it can push you over the edge. I will definitely send some prayers your way that the medication helps get you back in balance.
ReplyDeleteI will also pray for your strength in getting yourself to a therapist. I believe that there is a lot to be said of at least talking your issues out and your fears - if you can help alleviate the anxiety issues, that will directly impact the depression in a good way.
*hugs* I you need to talk, I'm around :) shoot me an email and maybe we can chat via ICQ
Chin up :)
Thank you so much for stopping by my blog! I struggled with PPD after my daughter was born and while I no longer need meds, my mood swings during PMS times are WAY worse than they used to be. I will definitely keep you in my prayers! I know how it feels :)
ReplyDeletei'm praying for you! remember that you have depression and anxiety - they do not have you. i'm praying you have the strength to make an appointment with a therapist, and that the therapist you contact will be faithfully seeking Christ and point you continually back to Him. it is one of the hardest admissions we make, i think, to admit we can't do it all and need someone else to help us along, but i think it's one of the most critical. let Him be your strength and your resting place. His heart is for you, Colletta!
ReplyDeletePraying that God will comfort and guide you. Hugs!
ReplyDeletePraying for you dear sister in the Lord. Praying Phillipians 4:13.
ReplyDeletemarypopmom (at) yahoo (dot) com
I have suffered from depression most of my life. I really suffer from 2 kinds, sometimes its a chemical imbalance but sometimes its emotional. I have learned that I can't let me self get over tired or it starts a cycle. I don't watch or read sad stuff because for some people it might be just a sad moment but for me it leads to weeks of depression. I don't know if you have tried this coupon or not but wanted to share it. This site has all sorts of coupons for all sorts of meds. Just look for the name and see if there are any offers.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.internetdrugcoupons.com/Abilify-Coupon
Hopping over from the linkup - I'll be praying for you!
ReplyDeletemy prayers..
ReplyDeletekitchen sink