A Blessing in the Mail

Yesterday in the mail I received a blessing.

It came in the form of a card from one of my readers who wanted to cheer me up.  And that she did.

Her words of encouragment mean so much to me and the card itself is just wonderful.

The fronts says:  "Your life shows what your words tell--that daily walking with God really makes all the difference."  And it does make all the difference. 

Inside is a Bible verse:  "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.  Romans 15:13"  This verse reminds me of the little children's song "Running Over, my cup is full and running over."  what better to overflow with than hope from the Holy Spirit.

On the very back of the card is a prayer:

Creator of all

We were made for Your pleasure

You are jealous for us

For You see our lives as a treasure

You want to walk with us day by day

To have people who gladly say

Lord we belong to You alone

We bow before no other throne

For You have redeemed us

With Your sacrifice

Our lives are not our own

Lord we belong to You alone

So come dwell in us

Make Your glory known

Our greatest joy is found

In knowing You

Belonging to You alone

Almighty God You've held plans for us

Through the ages

You give each life a call

And a reason for being created

We want to be a house You have built

A living temple that You have filled.

Isn't that beautiful? 

To give credit where due, the card is made by Integrity Notes at http://www.integritynotes.com/.  The poem was written by Steve and Vikki Cook.

To the very special person who sent me this card, and you know who you are, thank you so very much.  You are a blessing to me!

Crochet & Christmas Book Giveaway!!!

I haven't had a  giveaway for quite a while and so to show my appreciation to all my readers that is what I'm going to do right now.

The first item will be a handmade crocheted Earwarmer Headband in Christmassy colors, of course!

 

and....

What better book to read this time of year than a Christmas themed book?

Christmas Homecoming

by

Debby Mayne

Paige Winship Dooly

Elizabeth Goddard &

Elizabeth Ludwig

Soar to new heights in this inspirational Christmas romance collection where four females encounter love amid the Colorado Rockies.

A widowed grandmother, Carol Scheirer, is filled with angst, unsure that her family will accept the new man in her life.

Wedding planner Noelle Evans wonders if the guy who once jilted her deserves a second chance.

Old letters put writer Christmas Scheirer at odds with the guardian of her grandfather s estate.

Missionary Holly Rivers finds she still has feelings for the man she left behind.

Will mistletoe missives result in more than one Boulder bride?

Here are the ways to enter the giveaway:

+1 leave a comment with your email and answer the question:  "What is your favorite Christmas tradition?"  You must answer the question to be entered.

+1 Be a follower or become a follower and let me know that you are.

+2  Blog about this giveaway and let me know that you did.

That is a total of 4 ways to be entered in the drawing.

 
The drawing will be held on Tuesday, December 7, 2010 at 12pm  EST.
 
Thanks everyone for participating and for reading my blog!!  You have no idea how much I appreciate each and every one of you!
 

Also to add to the fun, I am currently at 191 followers.  If I make it to 200 followers by the drawing, I will be giving away a second Christmas themed book to an additional winner!

Give Me a K! (too funny!!!)

Hubby is playing around with the girls today on the last day off before school and work comes once again tomorrow.

Hubby is cheering:
 
"Give me a K!",
"Give me an A"!",
"Give me a Y!",
"Give me a L!",
"Give me an E!",
"Give me another E!",
" What does that spell!?!"

The three year old littlest in all seriousness states while not even looking up from what she is playing with....


"DOG POOP!"

Best laugh I've had in weeks!!  Just try to tell me that isn't hilarious!

Joann's Cyber Monday Sale!

Happy shopping everyone!

Scripture Memory Verse ~ 11/28/10

Memory Verse ~ 11/28/10-12/4/10

"This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe.  There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus." 

Romans 3:22-24

Hide these Words in your heart and they will be with you always.
     

Centering My Header Picture

Does anyone know how to center my header picture?

It would be great if someone could help me out!

Edited to add:  thanks so much to High Heeled Life for helping me getting my picture just right!!!!

TSMSS ~ Where's the Line to See Jesus?

Yesterday, while Black Friday Shopping, my husband and I saw all the happyor not-so-happy shoppers and little kids lined up to talk to Santa.  This song touched my heart because Christ has been taken out of Christmas to such a disastrous extent anymore.  Let's make sure to teach our children the real meaning of Christmas.



I'd like to thank Janet from "Along the Way" for directing my attention to this song.  Thank you!

Doily From My Mama

My mom made a doily just like this one and I thought it was so pretty that Iasked her to make me one just like it.  I'll have to ask her what the name of the pattern is.

It is rather large and filled pretty much the center of my dining room table.  Perfect for sitting my basket of flowers on top. 

Here is a close-up of the rose.

She has been on a doily kick for a while.  She makes them and puts little tags with the pattern name on it and is getting quite a collection.

She is great at reading patterns. I'm just starting to learn how to read patterns and have to ask her lots of questions.  So far I've made the Headband Earwarmer and a little sweater for my cockapoo.  (Pictures forthcoming).


She recently had me find a pattern book for a doily named "Audrey".  My grandmother's name who passed away.  Mom is now making each of her sisters one in different colors.

I'll try to get a picture of hers and show it to you.  It is a beautiful pattern.

Thanksgiving

Jennifer Nettles Hair

So this is kinda what my hair looks like now. 

If I actually styled it abit.

And my hair is brown.

Counseling Tomorrow

And I'm chickening out.  All day long I've thought ,"maybe I'll wait till I'm feeling a bit better."

By then I won't want to talk about it and will just want to ignore the problem and hope and pray I want have to deal with it again.  Is that called denial?

I need some encouragement to keep my appointment.

Any of you that have seen a counselor, any words of inspiration or comfort?

Headband Earwarmer

I found a link to this pattern over at http://www.mommaskindacrafty.blogspot.com/

This one is for my eldest who's favorite color is blue.  I used Peaches and Cream yarn.

I messed around with the flower a bit and kinda combined two different ones.

She loves it and wore it the whole weekend.  I mean the "whole" weekend.  Inside and out.

Youngest has a "Rainbow" headband.  The last I saw it, the dog was wearing it as a collar.  Oh well.  She was happy!  The dog...not so much.

Noni & Pops Thanksgiving Challenge

My good friend Rhonda from Noni & Pops Travels are honoring National Diabetes Month by donating $5 for every new follower they get this Thanksgiving week.

Go over to their blog for more details and to become a follower.

TSMSS ~ Press On by Selah

My mom and aunt sing this song together at church.  Every time I'm down, I request it.   I love this song.

Hubby Thinks He is Funny

I just told Doug that I took my first klonopin so if I start running around the house naked he'd know.

His reply:

"What?  Give you another one?"

Funny, funny...

Not.

Med Change

My Dr. changed my Xanax to Klonopin.  It is longer lasting and shouldn't have that creeping up of anxiety after a couple hours.

Klonopin is supposedly more of an anxiety preventative and Xanax is more reactive.

My brother's dr. switched him from Xanax to Klonopin years ago and he has had much better success with it.

I also made an appointment at Covenant Counselors, a Christian based counseling service.  I need to know how to fight this instead of just enduring (barely).

Thanks for all your comments.  I appreciate any and all insight.

Keep the prayers going Heaven-ward!

Call in to Dr.

I just put a call in to my dr. to see if there is anything that she can do today so I don't have to wait the whole weekend.  The Xanax just does not seem to be helping at all or very little.

The nurse is going to talk to the Dr. and get back to me.

Keep praying.  I'll update later.

Getting Real About Anxiety Depression

It's time I got real.  It is time I accept myself for who I am.  A person who struggles with anxiety and depression and intrusive thoughts.

I am a person who takes an antidepressant (Lexapro) and Xanax when I have major breakthrough anxiety like I am now.

I have struggled with some form of Dep/Anx for most of my life.  It really came on strong when pregnant with my first daughter and after. 

I never imagined I would be someone who had to take an antidepressant.  I was under the misconception that being an intelligent person, I could just think away those thoughts and feeling.  I was very uneducated on the condition and I apologize to all those commercials I saw when I was young and thought, "Just get over it". 

I had what I would call my first major depressive episode when my 1st daughter was 2 1/2 and my grandmother died.  I was working full time even though I wanted to be a SAHM so badly.  But I let myself believe that we HAD to have my income.  I thought I was absolutely going crazy and was headed for the "looney bin" so I finally went to see the doctor and semi-accepted the fact that I would have to go on some kind of medication.

I started off on Zoloft and had what I think was a reaction.  Who knows maybe it was just extreme anxiety.  Anyway, off I went and told the dr. maybe just an anti-anxiety med would be what I needed.  I struggled for an entire year using minimal Xanax because I hated the thought of taking it.

The next Spring, I crashed again.  I thought, Maybe going part-time would be the magic fix.  Struggled for a few more months, thinking I was going crazy.

I then broke down and went back to the dr. because something HAD to give.  I couldn't live like that anymore.  Major Depression.  Major Anxiety.

I finally agreed to try another Anti-depressant.  Lexapro along with Xanax for the anxiety.  Initial increased anxiety but pushed through and went up to 20mg Lex.

Felt good for about 2 years with a few minor episodes.  Decided I would go off the Lex and have another baby.  What an idiot!  I should have stayed on the Lex, no studies showed it would was harmful but I thought I was "superwoman" and could make it.

20 weeks into Pregnancy #2 and I (let's say it together) crashed.  Ob/gyn would only give me Wellbutrin.  What a nightmare!  I then went to my reg. dr. who gave me the Lex back.  Struggled through the rest of the pregnancy and went to 30mg Lex post-delivery with some Xanax on the side.

I eventually would go to Xanax only at bedtime and got the bright idea that I only needed 20mg Lex and talked my doc into trying it.  It was OK for a while until last Spring when (all together now) crash!

Went back up to 30mg Lex with a side of Xanax and eventually only used Xanax at bedtime.

If you've read this far you have now come through a brief overview of my past 7 years and are now realtime.

I've had lots of stressors the past couple weeks and have felt a crash coming on.  Money, weight, self-esteem, perfectoinism, anniversary of first crash, etc.

I've really been struggle the past few weeks and the last 2 days have been horrible.  I've been taking my 30mg Lex and Xanax 3X/day.  Thought it was just a bump.

Each and every time I come through to the other side of the darkness, I talk myself into believeing that it won't happen again.

I have to realize and accept that this is something I'll have to deal with on an ongoing basis.

So, I made an appt with my dr. for Monday.  I have a call into a counselor.

I have got to figure out a better way to deal with this.  Ignoring the problem when I'm feeling good is not working for the long haul.  But as soon as I feel better, I want to ignore the situation.

Facts:

-I've never seen a psych.
-I've been on Lex for 7 years (with brief interlude)
-I've got to accept myself for who I am with this condition.

Questions:

-Have you had a med stop working?
-What meds do you take?
-What are your stressors?
-Have you accepted this as a continuing condition?
-How do you cope?
-Psych or no?

Requests:

Pray for me.  Please.   Give me feedback.

Thanks for reading this rambling mess. 

Linking to: (because this is something homemakers also have to deal with)

Homemaking Linkup

Homemaker Monday

Making Your Home Sing (or not)

Stuck Like Glue & Hair

I LOVE Sugarland!  I can't wait to get their new CD.

I was determined to grow my curly hair out long, long, long again.  Lately, though, it has been getting on my nerves.  Then I saw this video.



I think this video is hilarious and isn't Jennifer Nettle's hair just too cute. 

Needless to say, I went to my lovely hairdresser, Tabbie, and had her chop about 6 inches off the length and then stack the back.  It is very similar to how I've had it before.

I LOVE it.  I hate pictures of myself so I don't know if I'll be brave enough to post one for you to see it.

Maybe...

Scripture Memory Verse Challenge ~ 11/14/10

Memory Verse ~ 11/14/10-11/20/10

"I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing." 

Galatians 2:21

Hide these Words in your heart and they will be with you always.
     

Throw the Scale Out the Window

Does stepping on the scale make you feel bad about yourself?  Does it make you feel worth less if it doesn't say what you want it to?  Does it discourage you and depress you?

It does me. 

I threw my planner out the window the other day.  Today I'm throwing the scale out the window!

I hate how it makes me feel.  I hate that it makes me feel less successful and less worth-while.

I hate exercising and hoping that it is burning those hateful things called calories.

I love exercising because it makes me feel good. 

I want to exercise for how it makes me feel and not because I'm hoping to burn "X" calories.  I lose the reason I enjoy walking if I see it as a chore because if I don't it will reflect on the scale.  I lose the sense of accomplishment from having a good workout and all that feel good goes down the drain when it doesn't reflect on the scale.

God love me as I am.  I am beautiful as I am.  I am precious as I am.  People like to be around me as I am and not for what the scale says.  Why can't we see ourselves through the eyes of those who love us?

Maybe because we don't love ourselves.

Here's to loving ourselves no matter what the scale says.  Oh wait, I threw it out the window, so I don't know what it says.  I'm much happier that way!

Will I leave it out there in the yard or will I pick it back up along with all the  baggage it carries into my head?

What are your thoughts on the matter?

TSMSS ~ You Raise Me Up

I really need raised up this week.  Thank God for His lovingkindness is everlasting!

Throw Your Schedule Out the Window

Sometime, I think we need to just put our schedule/planner aside for a few days and realize once again why we are doing what we do.

Why am I cleaning, doing laundry, blogging, crafting, volunteering at your child's school, running to basketball practices, going to church meetings...etc...  Is it because I "have" to?

When it starts becoming a chore and you lose the focus of "why" it quickly leads to burn-out/depression/anxiety.

We overload our calendar with busyness and beat ourselves up if we can't keep up that strict schedule and do it with a great big smile on our faces.

It is time to redefine "why".  I find I need to do this every once in while.

What are my priorities?  Who are my priorities?  What is my purpose?  What has God called me to do?  Am I listening or am I trying to interrupt with my own thoughts?

So sometimes, I need to throw my schedule out the window for a few days. 

Then I make a new one.  A better one because I am thinking about the "why's" and not just the "got-to's".

Anyone else ever feel this way?  Surely, I'm not the only one.  I hope...

Linking to:
Making Your Home Sing
Homemaker Mondays
Homemaking Link-up

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 11

I am very grateful for the 1st Place for Health Study's.

I am even more grateful for the 1st Place ladies that meet every Sunday morning at 8am.  We discuss our lessons, enourage one another and pray for each other.

I love these women!

White Bridal or Prayer Shawl

I used Caron Simply Soft Yarn in White to make this Bridal/Prayer Shawl.  I went a little crazy when I started it and chained more than I had thought.

It measures Approx. 18" X 96".  I told ya!  I went a little crazy!  Next time I won't make it as long.

This shawl took me many an evening of TV watching to complete.  Here's a close-up of the pattern.

I think it is beautiful and perfect for a fall wedding.

This shawl is now listed in my store.  Click here to go directly to the listing.

Linking to:

Made By You Monday
We Did It Wednesday
Wednesday at Tea Rose Home
Strut Your Stuff Thursday
Fantabulous Friday
Fibers on Friday

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 10

This is the Wills Mt. Church of Christ.  I've attended this church my whole life.

Today I am grateful for the Church family I have.  After all, the Church isn't a building, it is the people.  Having fellow Christians for love and support is very important to me.